We All Need Some Grace

Ever since I got back to every day life and reality has had time to set back in from vacation mode, I realize I’m already starting to get down on myself. “School is right around the corner and there is so much that needs to be done. Meal planning, school clothes shopping, organize the kids’ clothes, organize the pantry, get the garage in order, and I’m sure tons of other things that need to happen!” Yes, these were all of the thoughts running through me head about 5:30 this morning. That would make anyone go crazy, right?

Well I’m glad I can realize when old habits creep in and I have the power to not let those old things take over my life. I’m not in control of everything around me, but I am in control of myself and how I choose to go into the new school year. I’m in control of how I spend my time each day and whether I should spend time worrying or spend my time in a more productive manner.

I feel that some people think the more stressed out you are (and the more public you are about it!) means you are more productive. I believe the contrary to be true. When you are busy getting things done, you don’t have time to complain about how busy you are!

None of us are perfect here! We all need a little patience and a whole lotta grace!

Waves of Insecurity

One of the best things about being human is that most of experience the same exact emotions throughout the day, it’s just a matter of how we respond to those emotions.

Do we automatically retreat when we start feeling inadequate? Do we fight through the exhaustion and feeling of wanting to give up? Do we combat the urge to spew word vomit on the people who are really irritating us?

Personally, I go through waves of self-doubt and insecurity. I believe this is a perfectly natural response to trying something new or being in an unfamiliar situation, but once I started voicing these feelings to a few close friends I realized I wasn’t the only one.

When we keep these feelings bottled up inside, we suffer alone in silence. If we could find someone reliable to share these insecurities with, we begin to find that we aren’t alone after-all. Most people feel this way, and often. It’s simply that we are too afraid to talk about these feelings of inadequacy.

I started feeling overwhelmed yesterday (with a very ridiculous “problem”), but instead of wasting my day in worry and angst about not knowing the answer I simply called one of my “people” and told her all about my feelings. She was empathetic telling me it was completely understandable to feel overwhelmed. She also said something that helped to activate some portion of my brain triggering a solution to my problem.

Yes, I probably would have came to this same conclusion on my own, but it was so much faster and easier (and might I add less frustrating) to let someone help me through these feelings.

Please find someone to share these feelings with today. It doesn’t have to be a large group where you formally sit down to have coffee with on a regular basis. I’m talking about 1-2 people whom you can feel free to share your inner demons with that will no judge how you’re feeling but will simply listen and bounce around ideas.

You’ll be surprised how quickly this small change can have a HUGE impact on your life!

Knowing When It’s Time to Change It Up

Summertime in our household is definitely not one that is completely on schedule with everything running smoothly. No. Not at all. Some days we are up and out of bed ready to start the day and others we linger in our PJs until lunch time and then realize we all forgot to brush our teeth. (Except for my husband who works outside the home. He brushes his teeth on time every day!)

Lately, as we start getting closer to the dog days of summer, I’ve really been struggling to stay on a schedule with my daily writings. There is personal writing, blogging, motivational writing, and poetry I work on every day, but the struggle has been extra difficult when we stay up later than usual and I still try to get up at the break of dawn.

With all of the being said, I’m waving the white flag on the schedule this summer! I give up. No more trying to be perfect. (Progress not perfection, right?) I’m not going to fight the reality that is these next few weeks leading up to the start of school again. Yes, I could try to make it all work and stress myself out trying to be perfect (how fun does that sound?), or I can switch up the schedule and only work on things that are most important.

So I skipped a few days on my poetry; I’ll be more diligent in the Fall. So I wasn’t able to do practically any writing when we were out of town visiting family; I know other people will understand. So we weren’t able to do all of the fun and exciting things I had planned this summer; we are surviving and will all be okay.

If you’re struggling with your same ‘ole routine today, switch it up! Who says what you do daily has to be written in stone? Try to do something different and see how it works out. It may be a terrible change, or it could free up your entire day for something new and exciting. You’ll never know until you try.

How Do You Heal a Broken Heart?

This is one of those questions that will never have a clear cut answer. Your broken heart may be a completely different experience than mine. Yours may involve a significant other, while mine may involve a bratty teenager who said mean things. Your broken heart may consist of fighting and bickering, while mine was a slow death by a thousand cuts from someone continuously ignoring me.

There are endless possibilities on how to have your heart broken, but how do you put it back to together? How do you heal a broken heart? How can you make yourself whole again?

I believe the first step is to believe that you deserve to be happy again. Period…the end. No magical formulas to the equation. No tricks behind a curtain. No “fake it ’til you make it” when it comes to healing. You simply have to believe that you deserve to be happy.

Everything may not fall directly into place once you decide your worth in this world, but it definitely gets easier to arrange the pieces of your heart into new shapes. Maybe we aren’t meant to put the pieces back exactly how they used to be. Maybe we are meant to mold, stretch, shrink, knead, weave, and to create new pieces from the old ones that were shattered.

I’m not a therapist and I don’t claim to be an expert in the psychology of the human mind, but I know that when I feel that I deserve to be happy, life seems easier. Things figure themselves out. People are nicer to me (probably because I’m nicer to them). Not all of the odds are stacked against me.

If you’re suffering from a broken heart today, I hope you can find a way to fit your pieces (old and new) back together again.

Appreciation and Gratitude – Are They the Same?

We all know what the words appreciation & gratitude mean, but are they the same thing? I say, who cares! You need them both in your life and you need them regularly!

For example, I am highly appreciative of getting to see lots of our family and friends this weekend for a birthday party. I don’t get to see some of these family members but a few times a year so time with them is precious.

Also, I’m grateful that so many people we cherish and love were able to be in one place at one time. I’m happy that we have so many people in our lives that love and care about our family.

To me, appreciation and gratitude are one in the same. It’s not necessarily that the words mean the exact same thing, but that they are both needed in order to enjoy our lives more.

What do you appreciate about your life today? What can you be grateful for in this season of life?

 

 

 

Focus on the Important Things Today

There are so many distractions these days. There is work (whether that’s inside the home, outside the home, or for some people it’s both), family (which depending on your situation can range from daily encounters with your immediate kin all the way to your great-grandma), kids (there are too many extracurricular activities for kids to name them all), social media (this can be helpful in business, but it’s also a dangerous time waster), and of course everything else in between. I could probably ramble on and on about all of the “tasks” we keep ourselves busy with these days, but I don’t want to overwhelm you with information.

The point of recognizing everyone’s “busyness” today is to point out that there can be a LOT of distractions. We are distracted from doing the important things because we’re too focused on the thing we need to get done for work. Maybe we have a deadline. Maybe we have an important meeting. Maybe our boss is coming into town for a quarterly visit. But what about the birthday party your son begged you to take him to? What about the cartoon movie you promised your middle child you’d take him to, just you and him? What about all of the date nights you miss out on with your spouse because you’re exhausted from a long work week?

This isn’t meant to be a bashing session for people who work. (I love when people are committed to being successful in their careers and professional endeavors.) These issues can just as easily pop up in family scenarios. We are distracted because of the next family drama being played out in real life. The gossiping, the rude remarks, and the yo-yo diets could keep us all busy for years. What about the positive situations in our lives? What about the nice things we could say to each other instead?

Oh the activities for kids nowadays is a never ending list! Between volunteering at the PTA functions, to the baseball fields every week night, to planning class end of year parties, and working on countless other projects, we have all become distracted from just spending quality time with our kids. Sit down and play a game with your kiddos. Read them a book. Do something that doesn’t involve electronics.

And social media…I really think this one speaks for itself, but I’ll go ahead and say it:
WE SPEND WAY TOO MUCH TIME ON SOCIAL MEDIA!
(Myself included…)

Take a look at your list of things to do today. Take away the ones that don’t really matter and add in the ones that can add quality to your life. I know I needed to hear this myself today because I get sucked into the never-ending world of the internet sometimes.

Focus on the people in your life today. Focus on what really matters.

 

 

Pray for the Mundane

Do you ever feel silly saying a prayer? Like a problem you have is too small for your Higher Power (HP) to deal with? For example, potty training and cleaning the house. I’ve prayed countless times for these two things and I still feel ridiculous about it. But the truth is, prayer works.

I know we all want those big miraculous moments to happen to us so we can say we have had a divine experience to share with the world! But to be perfectly honest, I have those moments every day. I didn’t completely lose my mind this week because of my kids, that’s a miracle in itself! I haven’t given into my come-and-go temptations to drink, that’s a huge blessing. I haven’t completely given up the will to live because my laundry wasn’t done, the floors went without being mopped, or the dishes weren’t cleaned…a marvelous feat!

These tasks may seem mundane and completely absurd, but that’s the point. Nothing is too small for us to give over to our HP! The little things can easily become the big struggles in our lives if we let them consume us.

Give all of the obligatory, mindless tasks over to your HP. You have to do them whether you have someone helping you or not, so why not ask for guidance and strength along the way?

This one simple thing has made a HUGE impact on my daily life. I hope it will for you too. Happy Friday and have a great weekend!